Cleveland Browns Are Trying To Trade For Eagles HC Doug Pederson

CLEVELAND, OH – News coming out of Cleveland today is shocking to many for more reasons than one. In a press conference, that was announced to be held just six hours prior, Browns GM John Dorsey and Head Coach Hue Jackson announced they would be actively pursuing a trade for Philadelphia Eagles Head Coach, Doug Pederson. If you are wondering why Hue Jackson is in favor of this, it’s because they intend to move Pederson to Quarterback. When asked why this wasn’t a discussion being held behind closed doors, Jackson said “I lost the keys,” bringing on laughter from the room, however sources report that it was not a joke.

Dorsey later explained that he still has the utmost confidence in Jackson to right the ship in Cleveland. “The 1-31 record does not fall on the shoulders of Coach Jackson. It falls on the front office for putting Coach Jackson in a position to call plays for an NFL team.” Dorsey went on to say that if Pederson were to win the starting job, it would eliminate time to communicate the next play and lead to a quicker paced offense. Jackson continued, “We’re trying to change the culture here. I want to teach these men that things are earned not given. To trade for a quarterback and give him a starting job day 1 would jeopardize that message.” It was at this point that Dorsey grabbed Jackson’s wheely chair to stop the, now giddy, coach from spinning in it. Disoriented, Jackson and Dorsey promptly left the podium, pushed on the pull door, realized their mistake, then exited.

Doug Pederson had a 1-7 record as the Browns starting quarterback back in 2000. The .125 winning percentage is a vast improvement to Hue Jackson’s .031%. That one win is also more wins than all current Cleveland Browns quarterbacks combined. Yes, this move is crazy. So crazy it just might work.

 

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