Eli’s Final Days With The Giants?

EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ – There seems to be some changes on the horizon for the New York Giants, and the writing on the wall is all too clear for everyone except one player, Quarterback Eli Manning. Manning, who has been the face of the Giants franchise since 2004, has had his future with the team in doubt since being benched for 1 game during the 2017 season, but currently there are no worries on his mind.

While Eli and Wide Receiver Odell Beckham stole the show with a choreographed Super Bowl commercial with a dance routine from ‘Dirty Dancing’, it seemed the inspiration of the advertisement was not so innocent. It turns out Eli has always been trying to get into more commercials to live up to the legacy of his commercial-star brother, Peyton, and he has been begging Giants ownership for years to allow him to do so, and this year they’ve finally given permission. This is not the only case of Giants brass relenting to grant some of Eli’s oldest dreams and wishes.

Last month, the Giants allowed Eli to take over the official twitter account for an entire hour, something he has wanted to do for almost a decade. When finally granted permission, Manning celebrated the moment by tweeting, “Hello twitter! Hope everyone is having a GIANT day!”, causing a 2% drop in the team’s followers. A couple weeks later, the Giants gave permission to Eli to complete another lifelong dream, building and eating an octuple-decker oreo in the cafeteria at the team’s facility.


“Its been kind of weird,” says Wide Receiver Sterling Shepard, “Eli’s always had this long list of things he’s always wanted to do hanging in his locker, and lately he’s been getting permission to do all of them. He wanted to use the PA mic in the stadium but the Giants never let him, then last week they let him do it for an hour. Then he wanted to light the Empire State Building whatever color he wanted and he just chose all white.”


“It kind of reminds me when I was a kid and my parents told me we had to put my dog down,” Safety Landon Collins stated, “They let me spend a whole day doing whatever I wanted with him, go to his favorite park, let him eat whatever he wanted, really live it up while he can. I think Eli’s doing a lot of that, just with a VR headset.


While nothing is certain, it seems as though Giants ownership is trying to grant as many final wishes of Manning’s as they could. When asked for comment, Eli, with audible excitement in his voice, said he was unavailable as the Giants were taking him to Six Flags Great Adventure to “ride the ‘Superman: Ultimate Flight’ roller coaster.”


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