As I’m sure you know, Jacksonville Jaguars cornerback, Jalen Ramsey, made headlines a few months back when commenting on every starting quarterback during an interview with GQ. I know the context is old, but I’d rather talk about this than the spotlight he’s recently brought onto himself for his claim that he could play in the NHL with 6 months training. I brushed it off at first, but based on how hockey players are responding to it, it’s clear that “hockey tough” doesn’t refer to the mental side of it. If it’s that easy to get inside their heads, who’s to say he won’t score a pigeon goal in the league.

Anyway, with week 1 of the NFL behind us, it’s now time, as a media source, to make sweeping declarations and generalizations on these players. No one deserves that more than Ramsey after countless egregious lapses in judgements when evaluating his league-mates. Let’s revisit some of his statements:

Deshaun Watson and Carson Wentz – Future MVPs

“Future MVP” Deshaun Watson went up against 5x MVP Tom Brady. If you want to be the best you got to beat the best, right?

oh…

And Wentz, lets see his stat line.

The only MVP I see is Nelson Agholor for having the greatest completion percentage in NFL history.

Aaron Rodgers – “Does not suck.”

Dude, Rodgers was basically non-existent during the first half. For the majority of it, it’s like he wasn’t even there. I prefer my quarterbacks to put a complete game together. No questions asked.

Joe Flacco – “Sucks”

I’m just gonna leave this hear.

Thanks but no thanks, Kim WRONG Un

Matthew Stafford – “I think he’s straight.”

Yeah, straight into the defenses hands.

Ben Roethlisberger – “Decent at best.”

Ehhhh… I don’t know about that. Decent quarterbacks don’t tie the Browns.

Dak Prescott – “He’s good. He’s alright. He’s okay.”

In all seriousness, I love this answer. I mean first off, you’re wrong, Jalen. Dak is trash.  But when this article made the rounds, I know every QB gave it a read. I imagine Dak reading that sentence and seeing “He’s good.” And being like…

Then, “He’s alright. He’s okay.”

Hilarious.

Marcus Mariota – “Great”

Lol.

So, in closing, I’m only asking one thing of you, Jalen Ramsey.

PS: Longest yard? More like wrong-est yard.

PPS: Sorry you had to read that.