I’ve Forgiven Todd Gurley, And You Should Too

Two weeks ago, Todd Gurley was justifiably on everyone’s shit list after purposefully avoiding the endzone in the final moments of a game against the Green Bay Packers. While the Rams still won, it caused them to not cover the spread and kept the game from hitting the over. Gamblers, children, dads who prefer the game to be played “the right way,” people (Patriots fans) who say “if you ain’t cheatin’ you ain’t tryin,” were all crying foul. As someone who gambles, (I bet $20, but tell everyone I bet $50-$100 to sound cool) I get it. He got even more flack for his comments post game and on Instagram.

https://streamable.com/s/mgpee/sfuwkj

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He dug himself into a hole of selfishness so deep it made those Chilean miners look like they were buried up to their necks at the beach.

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And he’s kept digging. So much so, that he commented this on the NFL’s Instagram page on Sunday.

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And I gotta tell ya… I think he dug so deep he made it out the other side. I love this comment for 2 reasons. 1) It’s fucking funny to spit in everyone’s face with these tongue and cheek troll comments  2) I remember being heartbroken as a kid learning that you can’t actually dig to China. So this gives me hope. Also, it justifies one of my favorite, criminally underrated films of all time, The Core.

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Let’s be honest, you didn’t lose that much money, Todd did more than enough in fantasy that week if you have him, and I know for a fact you’re not a Rams fan, because they don’t actually exist. What we are looking at here is an athlete that is the embodiment of Eric Cartman drinking tears

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and I couldn’t support it more.

I, for one, hate how the attention these athletes get prevents them from having a personality known to the public. Todd Gurley is showing it and I’ll be dammed if I’m going to let the world keep shaming my friend* for it.

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